adjuncthell: Can I just say...?

Thursday, October 04, 2007

Can I just say...?

The What The Fuck?! Award today goes not to any students (crazy!) but to the brain trusts who decided to nix WebCT and merge it with Blackboard (or whatever the fuck it is they did).

You heard it here first (well probably not but whatever) :

BLACKBOARD
SUCKS

Er, rather,

FUCKING PISSANT
PUTAIN DE MERDE CRAPASS
BLACKBOARD
ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY AND EXTRAORDINARILY
SUCKS
BIG FRICKING ODIFEROUS CROTCH.

Imagine someone taking away your computer (or anything else in your life that Really Quite Rocks and makes your work 400 times easier) and giving you a supposedly new and improved one but it only does about 1/4 of the cool stuff your old one did and even to get it to do that much you have to spend 71 gigitons of time and effort involving crazy computer contortions the likes of which you have never imagined all while you stand on your head and balance cats on your feet. Also about every other day you have to get help yet again from a help staff who really doesn't know much either - not because they aren't worthy but because this new computer is the most asinine thing to come down the pike since, say, footbinding or female circumcision and has new crap go wrong with it pretty much every fucking day.

Oh and need I add that you can count on being up much later than anyone ever should need to be to fix the tiniest little crap thing? Things which, needless to say, would take about 3 nanoseconds in WebCT and look a gazillion times better rather than ending up resembling some crap primitive web page from 1997.

A few more minutes of the last thing I finally got resolved and I would have been begging for some kind of Really Stupid Student shenanigans to deal with instead.

Yes.

It's. That. Bad.

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The world is full of this kind of dumb smart-alec who doesn't understand anything.

- Richard Feynman  

I did not achieve this position in life by having some snot-nose punk leave my cheese out in the wind.

 - Ed Rooney, Ferris Bueller's Day Off by John Hughes

  Danny: I've gotta go to college.. I gotta. 

Webb: Aahh Danny... You don't have to go to college; this isn't Russia. Is this Russia? This isn't Russia is it? No, didn't think so..

 - Caddyshack  

Of course there's a lot of knowledge in universities: the freshmen bring a little in; the seniors don't take much away, so knowledge sort of accumulates.  

- A. Lawrence Lowell

  If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.  

- Frank Zappa  

In school, we had a policy of never studying unless it was absolutely necessary, and still got high-to-mediocre grades. This convinced us that we were smarter than the average citizen, and actually, we're still thinking that way.

 - Jo Ann Beard, "The Boys of My Youth," The Boys of My Youth  

  ...I hesitated; with the lack of self-knowledge I'd exhibit for years to come, I'd signed up for an eight o'clock class.

 - Melissa Bank, The Wonder Spot  

You can lead a boy to college, but you cannot make him think. - Elbert Hubbard

  ...Meanwhile, the Internet's booming, and kids we gave C pluses to are waltzing out of college and getting rich on stock options while we bust our asses for a pathetic stipend that doesn't even cover the rent.  

- Tom Perrotta, Little Children  

You have four years to be irresponsible here. Relax. Work is for people with jobs. You'll never remember class time, but you'll remember time you wasted hanging out with your friends. So, stay out late. Go out on a Tuesday with your friends when you have a paper due Wednesday. Spend money you don't have. Drink 'til sunrise. The work never ends, but college does.

 - Tom Petty  

Colleges are like old-age homes, except for the fact that more people die in colleges. 

- Bob Dylan  

DISCLAIMER: The rocker quotes here should be taken with a grain of salt accuracy-wise as they are taken from thinkexist where many a poor quotation has been faultily cited. If anyone has corrections I urge you to comment. I would be very happy to make changes.