adjuncthell: funnest current post-semester student email

Monday, May 08, 2006

funnest current post-semester student email

Mme S,

I know that the final grades are done and I wanted to wait until that was finished to write this email, just so there wouldn't be a possibility that you might misunderstand my intentions. Didn't want it to seem like I was mining for a grade. Anyway, I just wanted to tell you how much I enjoyed your presence in my schedule this past semester. Honestly, I did not enjoy the class. A foreign language is something that is very fun to use, but a bitch to learn. So, that's why I didn't like the class....it took work! Imagine that. But I did really enjoy you as my professor. Thank you so much for bringing humor, wit, and a fun spirit into the classroom. It seems like all of my teachers have "I'm here for a paycheck...don't bother me" on their forehead, and it gets so monotonous! You brought to the table a fresh, young, and excited flare. That, to me, is so valuable. So thank you. Also, I hope you didn't think I was making fun of you that day regarding your new pants. I really did and do think they are just absolutely fabulous and truly feel that they deserved recognition. Just for future reference when wandering a mall: For your skin type and hair color, don't be afraid of brilliant colors (such as that delicious purple). Also, you seem to have an affinity for linen. You can never have enough. Especially for our geography and climate, linen is perfectly acceptable year-round; I don't care what the style channel says. Anyway, have a good summer and happy shopping!

Namaste,
Jerrod

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The world is full of this kind of dumb smart-alec who doesn't understand anything.

- Richard Feynman  

I did not achieve this position in life by having some snot-nose punk leave my cheese out in the wind.

 - Ed Rooney, Ferris Bueller's Day Off by John Hughes

  Danny: I've gotta go to college.. I gotta. 

Webb: Aahh Danny... You don't have to go to college; this isn't Russia. Is this Russia? This isn't Russia is it? No, didn't think so..

 - Caddyshack  

Of course there's a lot of knowledge in universities: the freshmen bring a little in; the seniors don't take much away, so knowledge sort of accumulates.  

- A. Lawrence Lowell

  If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.  

- Frank Zappa  

In school, we had a policy of never studying unless it was absolutely necessary, and still got high-to-mediocre grades. This convinced us that we were smarter than the average citizen, and actually, we're still thinking that way.

 - Jo Ann Beard, "The Boys of My Youth," The Boys of My Youth  

  ...I hesitated; with the lack of self-knowledge I'd exhibit for years to come, I'd signed up for an eight o'clock class.

 - Melissa Bank, The Wonder Spot  

You can lead a boy to college, but you cannot make him think. - Elbert Hubbard

  ...Meanwhile, the Internet's booming, and kids we gave C pluses to are waltzing out of college and getting rich on stock options while we bust our asses for a pathetic stipend that doesn't even cover the rent.  

- Tom Perrotta, Little Children  

You have four years to be irresponsible here. Relax. Work is for people with jobs. You'll never remember class time, but you'll remember time you wasted hanging out with your friends. So, stay out late. Go out on a Tuesday with your friends when you have a paper due Wednesday. Spend money you don't have. Drink 'til sunrise. The work never ends, but college does.

 - Tom Petty  

Colleges are like old-age homes, except for the fact that more people die in colleges. 

- Bob Dylan  

DISCLAIMER: The rocker quotes here should be taken with a grain of salt accuracy-wise as they are taken from thinkexist where many a poor quotation has been faultily cited. If anyone has corrections I urge you to comment. I would be very happy to make changes.